MIKEs DAILY PODCAST Monday 4/22/2013 9pm

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MIKE's DAILY PODCAST effizode 499 Monday April 22nd 2013 9pm Pacific Time
"Internet Talk Radio For Your Imagination!"

As a first on Mike's Daily Podcast I am including the script I wrote for one of the sketches.  You can read it at the bottom of this blog post.  I hope you enjoy because it took a lot of time to write that b@st@rd!  Do you have any idea how much white-out I had to use?!?

Today we hear from Madame Rootabega, Valentino, and Bison Bentley, PLUS we bring you the segment WILLYA SHADUP's LIBERTY NATION FREEDOM PHONE FOR ALL where conservative talk radio meets a swift hand slap across the face.

Tomorrow we bring you the segment WOW, SCHATZ, WOW, plus we'll hear from Chely Shoehart, Floyd the Floorman, and John Deer the Engineer.

Email me if you'd like to sponsor the show or if you'd like to be a guest on the show at MikesDailyPodcast@gmail.com
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Okay…here's the script from today's WILLYA SHADUP.  This is some of the sausage making, if you will…

"There’s a lot of hooey going on in today’s world and by “hooey” I mean sh*t!

 Let’s take a call…

 

Hello Willya.  This is Geraldine from Norfolk Virginia.  I am so disgusted that Obama didn’t say terrorism at all last week.  He didn’t even say terrorists!  He didn’t even say terror…or tear…or t–!  Why won’t he say exactly what I want him to say?

 

I don’t know, Gerald.  It could be because he’s not made out of a felt substance that you can easily stick your hand in to control his mouth.  AND THAT’S SO UNAMERICAN!!!  Let’s take another call…

 

Hey Willya, this is Bob, first time listener, long time caller.  Can you explain to me why the sequester hasn’t killed me yet?  I mean, Obama said it was going to be such a big deal, but nothing happened!  Absolutely nothing!  Hold on, my house has been on fire for three hours and I’m just seeing if that’s the firem—. Nope.  Just a big red Swan’s truck.  Gee I love that icecream.

 

You can’t get me to eat their icecream fast enough!  That is, unless they change their name to Chick-Filet and make a delicious Christian chicken icecream.  Closed on Sunday’s because Jesus believes my pancreas needs a day of rest.  Let’s take one more call!

 

Willya, I am not conservative, nor a Republican, nor a libertarian, nor a tea-partier, nor a closeted gay homophobe who loves to watch George Clooney in his pre-gray years.  I am, however, a defender of marriage.  And not how 2013 defines marriage, but how 1013 defines marriage: between a man, a woman, and some sort of livestock that provides all the milk I require.  Willya, I believe in human freedom.  And in human bondage.  In fact, I’m having a party if you’d like to come over tonight.  Just leave your keys in the tray on the way passed the door.  You’ll enjoy my party, Willya.  It’s my party for two party.  We’re a little repetitive, but I found it’s more stimulating if it’s done over and over again.

 

Thank you non-defined caller.  I will NOT show up at your party because I’m deathly afraid of you, but I do believe we should go through life non-defined!  No labels!  No pre-conceived notions. (Geez that guy was a wack-job).

Join me again next time for another exciting call-in show as we tackle the big topics that grip America!"

End scene.

Published by Mike Matthews

Mike's Daily Podcast features the characters Mike Matthews did for 11 years on the Santa Fe Cafe radio show that was heard in Ventura County, California, as well as some of the characters Mike did on other radio stations in the late 80's and early 90's.